Moms and Dads
Love yourself and the rest will follow: Let dancer-mom Siya Daryani inspire your healing and self-care journey
We’ve all been there. That feeling of being lost in the mad rush of life. For a lot of moms, it’s the gazillion tasks that come with raising and chasing children and running a household—not to mention for some, growing a career. Self-care often gets bumped off the priority list, way under the more urgent homework, house chores, and Zoom meetings. Parenthood can sometimes leave us gasping for air. While a lot of women feel like they’re living their dreams, it’s too easy to feel and get lost in the process.
Siya Daryani is no stranger to all of this. It’s what eventually inspired her to go on a spiritual journey and start her own performing and events company, OneTwoStep. An energetic mom to twin boys and a bubbly wife, she enjoys juggling family and work.
“I kinda like living on the edge like that,” she admits, but with a kind of confidence that springs from a deep knowledge of the self. It’s that charming air about her that made us want to know who she is and why she is so positive.
Siya walked us through her path to self-discovery and we list down the takeaways from her enlightening story:
Takeaway 1: You are enough
Siya’s spiritual journey began when she and her husband Rahul moved to Manila after marrying, but it wasn’t until she had kids that she did a deep dive. In spite of living the life she wanted as a little girl, Siya felt that something was missing.
That’s when she stumbled upon Marissa Pearson on Instagram. Marissa is a London-based hypnotherapist and she was giving a class about feeling ‘enough’. “Where I am, who I am is just enough. Sometimes due to past experiences like childhood or past lives we get into this survival habit of running after something always. Nothing feels enough because we don’t think we are enough,” Siya relays, “So I did that one-hour free online session with no expectations. Just because something inside me said, ‘do it’.”
At the end of the program, Siya felt like a new person and came to terms with her childhood. She also mustered the courage to open her dance studio. But that was just one part of the trip.
Takeaway 2: Be kind to yourself
As the demands of her new business piled onto her already busy family life, Siya soon found herself seeking balance. Through the help of close friend and therapist Hanna Supetran, she discovered the Emmanuel Dagher. His lessons, along with teachings from Indian healer Usha, allowed Siya to see her self-worth and how important it is be kind to herself.
Many moms can relate to the guilt and self-criticism that happens when we can’t juggle different roles. While we love our kids and want the best for them, parenting is a tough job (on top of our other jobs) and its challenges can make us fail or lose our cool. We stress out about not keeping it together. We nitpick our traits, see them as faults, and criticize them.
“In that session [Dagher] asked me to see the part of me that judges me of not being able to balance my roles, and like a little child, love that part of myself and forgive it as it was just trying to save me in the best way it knew,” she recalls. “It taught me to accept every part of me that I consider good or bad. I was trying to change myself and its okay to choose to be better but it taught me to do it with kindness and by honoring those parts of myself with compassion and gratitude. It made me realize that without all those parts I wouldn’t be the Siya I am today. I am perfect the way I am.”
Now, Siya has learned to have fun with the challenges that come with parenting and the demands of her job. She adds “I do throw tantrums, but I end up taking responsibility for my life and actions. And that’s what is most important!
Takeaway 3: Find what resonates with you
As stories vary from person to person, Siya emphasizes that one’s method for self-discovery and healing may not apply to another. She shares, “The best way to find out is ask yourself. If it resonates with you then great, but if it doesn’t don’t push yourself.” She encourages people to connect with the universe, watch out for signs and opportunities, and take them. As a matter of assurance, she adds, “Everything shows up at the right time and when you are ready for it.”
Takeway 4: Energy before words
Asked why moms should prioritize self-care, she goes on to explain how children have the capacity to read the true feelings that parents go through.
“If I don’t know what self-love, self-respect, trust, confidence, joy, or happiness are or what they feel like, then how am I going to teach my kids the same?” she expounds, highlighting the role of parents as the main teachers in a child’s life. “In order to pass these qualities, we need to find and feel them inside us because children learn from energy before words.”
By embarking on her own spiritual journey, Siya has found it much easier to show her kids lessons on success and failure; on treating others the way you want to be treated and how that begins with yourself.
Life can get crazy; and motherhood, crazier. Siya reminds us: “You will make mistakes along the way. The most important thing is to be compassionate towards yourself and understand you are a Mom, but you are human! Forgive your mistakes, learn from them and let go.
To learn about dance classes at OneTwoStep, please visit their IG account @onetwostep.ph