Mindy Lagdameo’s message reminds us that being a good mom starts with being good to ourselves
Whether it’s social media or just plain human nature, everyone expects moms to put everyone else’s needs before our own. But what happens when we give too much of ourselves?
Just ask mama of two Mindy Lagdameo. After a series of traumatic events and immense pressure, she found herself ready to give up. But after getting the help she needed, she found herself at the top of her game once again. Which brings us to the question: do we really need to reach rock bottom before we give ourselves the grace we give to others? Here, Mindy shares her story about surviving postpartum depression and how she found purpose through her pain…
A series of unfortunate events
A few months after giving birth to her second baby and deep into recovering from her CS, she was ready to start a new job abroad with her partner. Apart from having to care for her children, she had to sell her family’s belongings and pack up while her partner went ahead.
As a fitness professional who’s always had control of her body, her second pregnancy took a toll on her body. Not only was this pregnancy more complicated than the former, she had to take on a lot of bed rest and indulge in crazy cravings, causing her to gain 80 pounds.
“At two months postpartum, I hadn’t lost much of the weight,” explains Mindy, “To which my foreign employer says, our gym has a certain look that we have to maintain, and I can’t hire you because you don’t look like a coach anymore.”
When you lose your sense of self
To top it off, Mindy shares that a lot of people were comparing her postpartum state to her first pregnancy, where she was able to maintain her fitness and barely gained weight. Comments like “why aren’t you bouncing back?” or “what happened to you” didn’t help either. For Mindy, hearing these and having her foreign boss comment on her weight was the final nail in the coffin. She felt like she had completely lost her sense of self.
On the path to recovery
To let herself heal, she started to study more about postpartum depression. She explains, “It is really a physiological phenomenon affected completely by our postpartum hormones and and the triggers are different from mama to mama. For some it can be an unsupportive partner, for others the sheer load of motherhood, or looking in the mirror and not knowing who it is they see, others still, the loss of all things that were familiar before having kids..things like that.”
She learned what her triggers were, how to avoid them and took steps to make peace with it. She also found purpose in her pain. After realizing so many mamas were experiencing the same thing, she put all her effort into becoming a postpartum core rehabilitation specialist.
“Now, I help others find themselves, rebuild their postpartum bodies, to learn to have full function and control and most especially — love themselves again.” Mindy says.
Check out her inspiring message below:
Mindy’s message is a reminder to put ourselves first. She adds, “You can’t pour from an empty cup. The only way we can ensure our children thrive is if we allow ourselves to first.”
We need to remember that we are worthy of having all our needs met, even if it means taking an extra hour to run an errand or getting our hair done. Like Mindy says, we need to do what we have to do to make ourselves whole. Our family will absolutely be better for it.