Poop jokes, anyone?
Raise your hand if you’ve always wanted daughters, but ended up with a bunch of sons. Yes, with boys, life is an exhausting adventure filled with cuddles, endless snacks and random bits of booger on the walls. And being a boy mom changes you. It doesn’t mean you have to give up on all your self-care sessions — in fact, being a boy mom will make you want to cling on to them more, if anything.
If you’re expecting a baby boy, know someone who is, or looking for someone to commiserate with, here’s a list of truths only boy moms can relate to.
Truths only boy moms understand
You’ll never sit on a dry toilet seat again
Unless you can convince your boys to use their own toilet, you can be assured that any shared toilet seat will be wet. And not with water, either. Yes, boys are gross, which brings us to point 2.
Boys are gross
Boys are obsessed with poop, boogers and farts. Heck, if it comes out of your body, it’s funny. Also, they don’t really like washing their hands and avoid showers when they can. Yay. And yes, they’re very much obsessed with their penises — so much so that they’ll try to pull it off. This will be one of the toughest tasks you’ll have to undertake as a boy mom.
It’s easy to make them laugh
Jokes about poop, silly faces, farts — all these are funny to a little boy. In fact, the word “poop” alone can bring a smile to a boy’s face.
They love their mama more than anything
Ever wonder what it’s like to have a stalker? Have a little boy and you’ll find them absolutely obsessed with you and everything you do. Good luck using the bathroom alone. But here’s the thing: loving and being obsessed with you doesn’t necessarily equate to listening to everything you have to say. Ugh.
Boys are sweet
As gross and penis-obsessed as they may be, boys are the sweetest, cuddliest people. “When I’m sad or not feeling well, my boys are always the first to come to my side,” shares Marga, a mom of three boys.
They love to eat
Even as babies, boys are known to breastfeed and consume more milk than their female counterparts. And this goes on all the way till adulthood. Wait ’til they start asking you for snacks – while they’re eating.
Everything is meant to be explored
Whether it’s the space underneath your coffee table or your bedroom closet, little boys will climb and inspect just about anything. Don’t be surprised if they’ve figured out a way to use the dining table as a jungle gym.
Drama is their middle name
Think only little girls are dramatic? Little boys can be as dramatic as they come. You can expect a lot of growling, sighing, eye rolling and door slamming — under the age of 5.
They hug hard
Ask a little boy for a hug and it’ll feel something like a headlock. Ask for a kiss and you’ll get the biggest, sloppiest one. Boys are rough and full of affection!
Modern Parenting’s EIC, Marga Tupaz shares “As a mom of 3 sons and 3 daughters, I find that I am more protective over my boys for some reason. I love them all equally, of course. But with my sons, even if they’re all grown and are literally bigger than me, there’s always that need to take extra care of them, and they’re the same with me — and their sisters.”
Yes, even if being a boy mom means you’re a regular at the Emergency Room and your house always looks like it’s on the brink of destruction, having a little boy who thinks you’re the center of his universe makes it all worth it.